Saturday, August 02, 2008

If you give a toddler some french fries....

If you give a toddler some french fries....
He's going to want some "dippy dippy."
When you begin to pour the ranch/ketchup/mustard/bbq sauce on his plate, he's going to want to do it himself.
When he reaches for the sauce, he'll knock over his juice, spilling it all over the table.
You'll grab a washrag to clean it up.
When he sees you're not looking, he'll put his hand smack in the middle of the sauce and begin licking it off his fingers.
Then he'll rub it in his hair.
He'll ask for you to clean it off after he sees the washrag.
The washrag will bring back memories of the juice on the floor yesterday in the other room.
That will remind him of his new Hot Wheels car on the floor in the other room, getting him out of his seat at the dinner table for the 26th time that night.
When he's in the other room, he'll see the back of the TV, where he'll try to hide while he poops.
After he's done pooping, you'll need to change him. He'll stick is finger in the back of the underwear and come out with a poopy finger.
He'll want you to look at it.
When you're done washing his hands, he'll see the bathtub.
He'll want to take a bath.
When he's done, he'll climb out of the tub fired up and want to maul and wrestle his sisters.
He will, repeatidly, despite their protests.
That will get him in time out.
On his way to time out, he'll see his empty juice cup.
He'll want some juice.
The juice will bring him back to the table and the uneaten burger on his plate.
And when he sees the burger...
Chances are he'll want some french fries.


P.S. This blog post inspired by the children's classic "If You Give A Mouse A Cookie" by Laura Numeroff and Felicia Bond.

2 comments:

Uwannabet? said...

sounds like a normal evening at home

ksutheta said...

Very fun! Thanks for the note on my blog. I grew up reading The Salina Journal! Are you still in the Salina area? Let Joe know if there are any big poker tournaments in central Kansas!