Out of the womb

I suppose I don't blame the twins for taking as long as they did to leave the womb. The womb, after all, is a pretty nice place.
There's food, shelter and no real danger.
Eventually, though, everyone has to leave.
And so we brought them home today.
Both of them.
(We tried to leave one for a few more days, to sort of break us back into infant parenting, but the nurses wouldn't go for it).
As any infant is forced out of the womb by push, yank or, in our case, cut, something strange happens. The parents enter a womb.
The womb is the hospital, and it, like a uterus, is a pretty nice place. There's good, cheap, healthy food via room service or a quick trip to the cafeteria. There's shelter from life, really, as an unlimited supply of diapers, wipes and formula (or breastfeeding support; we took advantage of both) is only a reach away. Help from nurses is also only a moment's notice away as well. Most of all, there's no real danger. There's no danger of a sleepless night because you can take the babies to the nursery. There's no real danger of pulling your hair out when the babies just won't stop crying because the nurses are there to take over (or the dozens of visitors are there to take the baby). There's no real danger of the baby dying, and that irrational fear alone will burn a hole in parents' stomachs. Believe me, there was many a night when I stood over Jayden's crib and relaxed only after I saw his chest rise and fall a few times.
Outside the womb, all these things lurk just behind the cute outfits, cute poops and cute cuddles. And life tends to get thrown in there too. Like, say, your job. And all the stupid little things that we have to do, like laundry (which increases with babies) and cleaning (ditto) and making dinner. Many of these things are ruled by people who don't work on infant time and could care less that you have 20 minutes to race back to the house before your wife needs your help feeding a twin. Just the other day, taking care of a sinus infection (in that wonderful timing that life enjoys throwing at you) meant spending two hours at an "urgent" (ha) care clinic, then waiting an hour while the dumbfawkers at Wal-Mart stopping mouth-breathing long enough to fill my prescription in one of the worst cases of customer service I have ever seen.
But when Wal-Mart decided to lose a prescription customer, we were in the womb of the hospital, so it didn't matter that much.
Now we're out.
We've been lucky. We've had so many people help us. Twins do have an advantage in the sense that even those who would rather be strapped to headphones and forced to listen to recordings of goats humping, fingernails on a chalkboard and Celine Dion than have children understand that twins are tough. We've had more outfits than Baby Gap's spring catalouge dumped on us. We've got enough diapers to start our own store (look out, Wal-Mart), and just the other day my neighbor mowed my lawn for me, without me asking and even though I've been there four months and already managed to splatter the side of his garage while I stained my fence during a windy day. Every Tuesday one of Kate's co-workers fixes us dinner. My co-workers are planning to ship dinners as well.
We're hardly rich, but it's a nice start.
And Allie and Andie, so far, have been easy-peasy. I know there will be nights - and Allie already screamed bloody murder for 10 minutes before Kate finished pumping and we gave her the sweet, sweet gold - but so far, so good. So very, very good. Our doctor today said they've been healthier than many singletons.
Twins power, activate!
I'm lucky to have such a superstar of a mom for a wife. She's already pumping more milk than most dairy cows and has remained in good spirits despite a painful C-section and a touch of the blues (she had her first "I don't know why I'm crying" episode tonight).
We're out of the womb now, and we feel what I"m sure Allie and Andie felt as they were taken out of the uterus: A little scared, a little unsure and a little dazed.
But they're also looking around at all the new experiences with a little bit of wonder.
So are we.
After all, the world outside the womb can be a pretty nice place too.




P.S. I got an article published at Poker Works, ironically enough the first in a series on learning how to play poker while raising babies. Linda wrote a nice article about our birth, as did CC.
And I can't thank everyone enough for all your comments. It was so nice to see all of the support. I'll need it in these next few weeks, even if I'm not around as much as I'd like to be (the Mookie, for instance, is out for now). I"ll keep up as much as I can in these next few weeks and thanks.



AND NOW FOR SOME PHOTOS!!!!!



ANOTHER shot of the twins as they start to wake up from post-womb hibernation:



They naturally gravitate toward each other. I swear this is not a pose:



Jayden holding a sister (I'm not sure which one):



We found the house decorated when we got back. Outside the womb seems colorful and friendly. We just hope it continues!