Do you see what we saw?

That's Friday's ultrasound.
Take a closer look.
Not all ultrasounds look like that.
Yep.
That's right.
A pair.

Kate is 21 weeks into cooking up our second child, so today, Friday, we had our ultrasound. We are planners, and I'm probably one of the most impatient people on the planet (Christmas Eve was always torture; my purist parents refused to let us open even one present that night, so I usually pulled an all-nighter). So there was no way we were going to not now what the sex of the baby was.
We both thought it would be a girl. In fact, we ventured to say that we would be shocked if it were a boy. We had a boy last time, and this pregnancy felt, I dunno, different. Kate was sicker, longer, and there were days she was so exhausted that I'd have more energy after one of my half marathons.
"Every day is a half marathon for me," she would tell me.
Well, we got our shock.
"I've really felt a lot of movement lately," Kate told the ultrasound technican.
"Well, you're having twins, dear," she said.
Whu?

I've never had the crushing of two opposite feelings coming together like that, and I never will again. It felt as if I had just hit my one-outer to win a huge tournament. And it also felt like I'd just lost to a one-outer.
It was, at that moment, a cross between pure, utter elated joy and YOU'VE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME.
Kate started bawling, and at that moment, the technican realized that we had no idea we were blessed with a pair of Hiltons.
"Um, I gonna go get the doctor," she said as I held my head in my hands and shut off the video camera.
Yeah, that would be good, I said.
Daddy's gonna need a moment.

"They're having twins," she told the doctor.
"No, they're not," doc said.
But she came anyway, and she took one look at the ultrasound.
"Oh, wow," she said.
I was pacing.
Maybe because I'm already a parent, I was suddenly scared for my daughters.
"Are they separated?" I said.
"Yes," everything's fine.
So there's that.

As it turns out, the one-outer analogy isn't that far off. The odds of having twins is 3 percent. If that's isn't a one-outer, I don't know what is.
I called Mom, who couldn't speak. I texted my brother, "Big News," and he called and said, "What, you're having twins?"
"Yeah," I said.
"No, really, what's the news?" he said.
"Er...are you really?"
"Yes I really am."

Later he said this was exciting news for our family. It is. Kate and I, over a celebratory/Holy Shit dinner, decided to let it sink in for a few days. We won't think about the fact that my CRV, which we paid off just last month, may have to go. We won't talk about getting another crib, or how we were going to keep our sanity this summer, or how the hell we were going to raise two babies when we've already got the world's most demanding, active (and sweet) 18-month-old in the world.
We will worry about that later.

"Just make sure you do one thing," my brother said before he hung up.
"What's that?"
"Play lots of video games."

His point was to enjoy my life now while I can. These last few months are it. I'll play lots of poker and video games and run and hike and love Kate and spend lots of time with Jayden.
I'll enjoy my life, in a way, before it ends.
Although a small part of me can't help but think it's only beginning.