Am I lame? I am, Sam, I am

I remember, at 15, being indignant at Mom when she did not know who Def Leppard was.
"Hello, Mom? Foolin? Rock of Ages?"
The small part of my brain not reserved for Heather Thomas and her pink bikini cramped up when she shook her head. OMG, I thought, only I spelled it out because Internet chat was not invented yet.
I figured, of course, that Mom knew the Scorpions, at least. Surely everyone had heard of "Rock You Like A Hurricane."
Nope. Whitesnake? Culture Club? After The Fire (granted, a one-hit wonder, but Holy Cow what a song).
I was flabbergasted. I mean I could not BELIEVE that no one could be living on Planet Earth and not hear of these bands.
But for the past few months I find myself falling more and more out of touch with today's music.
And it's kinda bugging me.


The link shows my devotion to music. Remember it?

I used to stay up until 2 a.m., with only a small space heater that turned off every three minutes, to watch music videos because not only was it important to know every single song on Casey Casem's Top 40 Countdown (as well as plenty of hair metal), I had to see the latest ZZ Top video too (I mean, who could blame me, those storylines were the best).
That show was, for me, the only way to see them. If you were one of those rich, spoiled, insufferable kids who actually had cable in their houses (and I still hate you for that), then you may not because you got to watch Mtv before it concerned itself with showing hot-tub hookups instead of Eddy Grant's "Electric Avenue".
I would always prop up my droopy eyelids and snack on Doritos when they only had one flavor and still always wake up at 3:30 a.m. with drool on my chin and carpet marks indented into the left side of my face.

I think, at some point, you have to accept the fact that you aren't as hip as you were when you were younger. For me this point came when I was scrubbing Jayden's poop off my shirt for the third time that day.
I've accepted it. I buy most of my clothes at Kohl's. I rarely, if ever, visit a bar anymore and would be the guy behind the velvet rope all night at a nightclub. I don't keep up with TV shows
I do keep up with movies, but that's because Netflix makes it so easy, and my cue is still so long, that it's doubtful I'll get through them even after they appear on next year's Academy Awards show.
So this is not about being hip. This is about my love of music.
Today I probably couldn't tell you what the number-one song is any longer, and not only that, I definitely haven't heard it. I used to pride myself on knowing more about it than practically anyone. Music, and my time in the band, gave me self esteem in high school when I really had no reason to have any of it.

I don't really worry about it too much - I mean, anyone who had "Somewhere In Time" and "Powerslave" in his car's CD player the other day can't be THAT concerned about it - but I do wonder what I"m missing these days. There are some great bands out there - Kings of Leon, for instance - that I don't really know.
So here's what I have now. I have Mtv2's "Headbanger's Ball." I have a small army of friends who occasionally give me CDs full of Mp3s (thanks Bad Blood and Michelle). I have Internet radio and Pandora.
And if all that isn't enough, and Jayden, at 15, one day approaches me, all indignant because I haven't heard of the Dirty Rock Sitters, well, then I can just send him to his room.